Suggested Reading
We are pleased to suggest the following titles to understand more the values of dating with modesty.
A
Return To Modesty
by Wendy Shalit
The 23-year-old author first heard of "modestyniks"--Orthodox Jewish
women who withhold physical contact from men until marriage--while a
freshman at Williams College. She was initially fascinated by the way in
which they cleave to old ideals, especially amid a sexually saturated
contemporary world. But more so, Wendy Shalit was aghast at how
modestyniks are dismissed as sick, delusional, or repressed by the
secular community. "Why," asks the author, "is sexual modesty so
threatening to some that they can only respond to it with charges of
abuse or delusion?"
In her thoughtful three-part essay, the author reveals an impressive
reading list as she probes the cultural history of sexual modesty for
women and considers whether this virtue may be beneficial in today's
world--if not an antidote to misogyny. In an age when women are
embarrassed by sexual inexperience, when sex education is introduced as
early as primary school, and when women suffer more than ever from
eating disorders, stalking, sexual harassment, and date rape, Shalit
believes a return to modesty may place women on equal footing with men.
She yearns for a time when conservatives can believe the claims of
feminists and feminists can differentiate between patriarchy and
misogyny and share in the dialectic of female sexuality.
While the young author's argument is often limited by naiveté and her
own lack of experience, her profound intelligence and daring are
undeniable. A Return to Modesty is a thought-provoking debut that
introduces an original and exciting new feminist thinker. --Kera Bolonik
Girls
Gone Mild: Young Women Reclaim Self-Respect and Find It's Not Bad to Be
Good by Wendy Shalit
From Publishers Weekly:
In this follow-up to her 1999 A Return to Modesty, Shalit takes a second
stab at getting the women of the Western world to stand up and take
notice of their rampant objectification. Using letters, interviews and
various studies, this new book examines current attitudes toward
sexuality, "empowerment" and childhood among parents, teachers, kids and
the mass media. Like her last, this volume is dense with anecdotes
designed to shock and dismay (a mother who tells her 25-year-old that
she is going to lose her boyfriend if she doesn't sleep with him, a
teacher who tells a 14-year-old that you might as well call it over if
you haven't had sex by the third date), and to report on the women and
girls who aren't giving into the pressure of hyper-sexualized
society-including the harassment they routinely face because of their
stand (Shalit answers with admirable bonhomie her own critics, who
dismiss her as a backward-thinking " 'professional virgin,' " "a seat
that I believe is already occupied by Madonna"). This book takes a hard
look from the traditional family-values perspective at how we got to
where we are and what progress can be made, and does so with a
conviction that will resonate with and bolster many parents.
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc.
All rights reserved.
Culture
of Narcissism: American Life in an Age of Diminishing Expectations
by Christopher Lasch
When The Culture of Narcissism was first published, it was clear that Christopher Lasch had identified something important: what was happening to American society in the wake of the decline of the family over the last century. The book quickly became a bestseller. This edition includes a new afterword, "The Culture of Narcissim Revisited."
Women
and the Common Life: Love, Marriage, and Feminism
by Christopher Lasch
Christopher Lasch was a cultural critic who sought to redirect America's public philosophy through tough-minded essays of cultural and moral criticism. For several decades, Lasch wrote some of the most compelling and erudite essays in American letters, eschewing the wastrel and faddish trends that afflict much contemporary criticism. The end of his work was nothing less than the reshaping of our own self-understanding. Lasch attempted to make clear to his thinking readers that there is greater purpose in human life than "making it" either in business or the bedroom, combating the powerful drives of greed, lust, and pride in what he saw as our consumerist culture. In Women and the Common Life, Lasch directs his attention toward issues of marriage, feminism, and the men's movement in nine succinct essays that focus on the latent ideals of love and commitment. Too smart to lapse into false nostalgia for set gender roles or "traditional"family structures, Lasch rejects both the Right's unthinking conservatism as well as the Left's loose talk of "oppression" and "liberation." Instead, Lasch challenges gender theorists to consider their complicity in making market success a dominant social and political goal and to reappraise the cultural accomplishment of companionate marriage, which Lasch describes as a "union of desire and esteem." The foreword by Lasch's daughter--the editor of this volume--supplies a moving account of Lasch's last days and his influence on her own work.
The
Feminist Mistake: The Radical Impact of Feminism on Church and Culture
by Mary A. Kassian
In The Feminist Gospel, Mary Kassian provided a thought-provoking
inquiry into the history of feminism. Now, in this thoroughly revised
and updated book, she revisits the subject, adding to its history an
examination of the effects of feminism. The Feminist Mistake is a
reliable, biblical critique that will provide answers and inspire
serious reflection on this issue.
“Mary Kassian’s thorough look into the development of feminist thought
is a sound refutation of a movement that clearly rejects the authority
of the Bible. A valuable tool for today’s Christian!”
Beverly LaHaye, Founder and Chairman, Concerned Women for America